So the other day I wore this outfit, it was pretty hot and I want to get more sun on the parts of my body that are typically covered with clothes. Yes, I expected to get some glances. I realize that some people are offended because my body is not the incredibly thin types we are used to seeing in clothes like this. I realize that many girls (and guys) believe this is only something skinny girls should wear. I also know that some people would say nobody should wear this because it’s “too revealing”. I say fuck that because I realize there isn’t a damn thing wrong with the way I am.
So I’m out with my fiancé and we are going to get some ice cream. A woman and her daughter who is probably around my age are sitting down near a table by the entry and as I walk up I heard someone saying “look” I happen to look up and I see this woman is pointing directly at me and whispering something to her daughter while staring at me the WHOLE TIME. These women are right next to where I am standing. I’m thinking to myself does this woman have no shame or does she not know I see what’s going on. I stopped and glanced at her for a bit, made eye contact. She continued to look me up and down, her daughter either embarrassed or just doesn’t want confrontation won’t even turn to look at me. I rolled my eyes and walked off, brushing it off as a typical gossiping woman with nothing better to do than talk badly about another woman she’s never even met.
Then as I walk in the mom says “look now” rather loudly and I turn around to see the daughter looking. I smile, and wave at them both.. which seemed to make them uncomfortable and the mom shook her head as I walked off.
We get our order and go to sit outside, and we have no choice but to walk by them. The woman is still gawking at me. Now I was thinking “is this woman serious right now what the fuck is her problem” the daughter isn’t doing much, can’t even look at me. I’m irritated, but I do not want to cause a scene. I finally say “Hi, how are you doing today” and she was so. fucking. shocked. She just said in an overly cheery voice “I’m doing great” smiled then complimented my lipstick. I laughed, and walked away. Daughter wouldn’t look at me still, by now I think she’s just embarrassed of her mothers ridiculous behavior.
I do not know what her actual problem was, but I would like this woman and others like her to know that none of your casual (or not so casual) harassment is going to make me any less confident, nor will it make you any happier with yourselves. Do not be bitter of other women and teach your daughters the same. Your daughters, especially young ones, are impressionable.. your words about other women have an effect on them and how they view other women. End toxic girl on girl hate. Instead, build one another up, do not tear others down. We all have inner battles and struggles going on, we can all relate on some level.
Do not think that you need to follow any certain “rule” because of your body size or appearance, and do not impose such ridiculous rules and expectations on other women because you cannot possibly fathom how someone with a non slender body has a shred of confidence in herself.
If a woman is wearing something you would feel over exposed in, realize it is a personal choice; a preference. Not something that applies to all of us. Most importantly, know that a woman’s choice of attire does not reflect on her worth, her self respect, intellect or humanity. ..and if people just aren’t treating you right, kill them with kindness. 👍